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Monopoly Optimised Dice

If you want something done properly, do it yourself.

"Guys, and I mean this inclusively," I said to my team of designers, "I need you to put your best foot forward and do some top notch, Triple A, best-in-class designing. This really has to be an A1, first-class, five-star design from the top shelf. I need your grade A work."

"Consider it done, boss!", they said. "Count on us! We'll make a world-class design for you asap, big man, Big Cheese, head honcho, numero uno, Mr. Upstairs, El Presidente, top brass, capo di capi, …"

Realising they were just going the spend the rest of the day thinking up synonyms for management, I decided to go ahead and make something myself. Please enjoy these Monopoly optimised dice. Make sure you get first turn.

Innovative (Credit) Card Wallet / Clip

It's the stl-file download site that just keeps on giving. Yessiree. The people that gave you the print-it-yourself helicopter (be sure to read the disclaimer) and underpants now present: the credit card wallet / clip. It will hold two to eight or nine non-embossed cards if you print it with decent plastic.  Download it quickly before the file is gone and have a look before the pictures fade. Nothing lasts forever, you know.

Press Release: announces the discontinuation of Gloogle (TM) Pince-Nez (TM) announces the discontinuation of Gloogle (TM) Pince-Nez (TM).The main reason behind this decision is the fact that we're stopping it. It has been a few months since we announced the innovation and in this period, instead of several, let alone a lot, we have seen no third parties coming out with cheap copies.
Also, reactions to the Gloogle (TM) Pince-Nez (TM) have not always been positive. For example my wife has remarked several times that she couldn't blame all on the Gloogle (TM) Pince-Nez (TM) but that wearing it made me look like a total g**, you stupid ****.

Employees wearing the Gloogle (TM) Pince-Nez (TM) have been barred from entering cinemas, bars and restaurants in the larger 3Dteedee hometown area and the local Starbucks (Starbuckses? Starbucks?) told us that "If we wanted to drink a coffee there …" – "But we'll never want to. We think you’re crooks. (Though we think your pro stance on gay marriage is pretty cool.)" – "But if we wanted to …" – "But we won't." – "But IF we wanted to, we would have to take it off" ("But we won't").

When one of our employees wearing the Gloogle (TM) Pince-Nez (TM) almost nearly injured himself during the Friday-afternoon trampoline karaoke – ironically in the same Idea Birthing Room where the Gloogle (TM) Pince-Nez (TM) was conceived – we decided to call it a day and discontinue the development. Some employees were starting to think they were the Borg anyway. (Star Trek reference)

Plus Twitter left us.

Awww isn't that nice. It's a flower-shaped guitar pick holder.

The picks are the leafs. By all means, download and print it if you like; I didn't make this for me. I absolutely, positively hate flowers. "But Maarten," people will say whenever this comes up during conversations, "without flowers there wouldn't be any butterflies." My answer to that is always the same: "a) 'Eeeweeneeneemeenee butterflies, I'm such a big baby because I like flowers and butterflies' and b) That would suit me just fine. If there is anything that I hate more than flowers, it's butterflies." Poncing around like they're so special. And that horrible insect-y smell. Eurgh. Disgusting creatures. Lady bugs are probably fine, I have no opinion about lady bugs.

Tumbler that won't stay up

My great-great-grandfather Ludwig 'Cyrano' Huppertz famously coined the expression "People will come to you if you have something that makes them go." It's obsolete now, not many people use it anymore. Not many people used it then. A veritable 'uomo universale' he juggled his jobs as a council member ('THE council', he'd answer when asked which one), toy designer, town crier, ghost writer of love telegrams (which explains the nickname) and importer of coffee and tobacco (which explains the saying above) with his many hobbies, such as surgery, collecting erotic postcards and shopping. In short, the man was an absolute genius. But he could be an total idiot too, as his design of this tumbler that won't stay up, demonstrates.

Download the free stl-files here.

Electric toothbrush brush head holders

True story. Although, if I say "true story", I may be building it up too much. You are not going to say "My God, I can't believe that really happened!" at the end of this. I just mean it was an actual event. Actually, 'event' is a very big word too, but anyway... I was about 16 or 17 years old and we were sitting at the kitchen table; my dad, my mother, by brother and I and a guest. Probably a neighbour or friend or relative... I can't remember. It doesn't matter for this story. We were talking about how in our family we all - It was an aunt. I remember now. - had our own toothbrush.

"I always use the green one," I said. "My brush is the blue one," said my brother. "Mine's the yellow one," said my mother. (Obviously leaving the more popular colours for her boys.) We all looked at my dad who thought for half a second and then decided that he didn't care enough to lie about this and admitted: "I always just take the first brush I see. I wouldn't know which colour is mine." "I suspected as much," said my mother. "I saw that your red one looked suspisiously unused." :-)

Here are two designs of electric tooth brush holders - a four-person and two-person version - free to download.

Volvo 240 Sunvisor Clip

It would be nonsense to compare making these Volvo 240 Sunvisor Clips to Mozes leading his people through the desert, but put it this way: I know how he felt! FOUR times I had to print the thing, though that's including a second one because you need two. I found them on the internet too, at about $ 3,30 a pair.' Pff. Yeah right. No way man. I'll make them myself, thank you very much', I said (to the screen). Having said that: if you have funds like that, buy the original. They're much better. If not, download my free STL file here and print it yourself.

270 Degree Hook

I have fond memories of my grandfather, who was a very wise man, calling me to him and saying: "Maarten…" (He always used to call me Maarten.) "Maarten," he'd say, "I've heard that the earth can be seen as a very large magnet, with the earth's poles acting very much like a regular magnet's poles. I think that's total bull." He told this lovely story many times. Of course, being just a lad, my answer could only ever be: "What? I don't know. What?"

But his words kept ringing in my mind and started a train of thought ultimately resulting in a) my finding out, when I read about this once, that indeed the earth does work like a magnet and b) my design of this 270 degree hook.

Download the free STL file here.

Zebra-pad! Get it? 'Zebra-pad'!

This is probably only funny if you speak Dutch. It probably isn't even funny if you do speak Dutch. But here it is: the zebra-pad! It's as stylish as it is green, but in some strange way it always reminds you of a Scrabble game without any E's. I'm sure you thought the same thing when you saw it.
More pictures and STL files here.

Super Cute Gift Tokens

The term 'cute' just didn't cut it for these gift tokens, so we had to come up with the term 'super cute'. As you can imagine, we're pretty proud of ourselves.

You can give these as a present for people to choose an actual concert, theater visit or wine tasting with, or use it for something else completely, though you would have to think up yourself what that would be, because having to invent 'super cute' has left us totally drained.  More info and STL files here.

Gloogle (TM) Pince-Nez (TM)

Sure, you can settle for common glasses, like the ones made by our main competitor, who shall remain unmentioned. (It's Google. I mean Google.) But maybe you want something with a bit more 'savoir faire', a bit more 'joie de vivre' and, of course, a bit more 'noblesse oblige'. Presenting: the Pince-Nez (TM). It's a pince-nez (tm) but it's also a computer that runs on TB-DOS (To Be Developed Operating System).

The design is there. Once we've built the technical part, these babies are going on sale as betas to 100.000.000 paying testers, at an undisclosed price to protect them from ridicule. More info and STL files here

Classy Dung Beetle Brooch

They always want the damn butterflies, but did you know that the dung beetle is one of the most useful and important animals in the animal kingdom? So this brooch, made in its honour, is an acknowledgement that was long overdue. And such a classy one as well! Impress your friends or wear it to work. Or to a fancy party where it will act as a conversation starter! You can imagine it going something like: "Eurgh! What the hell is that thing on your shirt or blouse? That's disgusting!". "Well... did you know that the dung beetle is actually one of the most useful, and important … ". Anyway, you get the idea, I don't need to tell you how to talk. More info and STL files here.

Support our boys in Brazil!

No trying to be funny with this one! Football is a serious matter. I'm supporting our boys in Brazil by printing 20 of these these supercool Dutch foolball association clips without having asked permission to use the logo for whoever wants them. So send me an e-mail if you want one or two. State your address and let me know on which side the opening of the clip has to be when looking at the front. More info and stf file here.

Venturing into the realm of metaphysics at 3Dteedee?

Jacques Derrida used the deconstructive strategy to expose ingrained ways of thinking and one way
to expose dualisms - a Metaphysics favourite - is to invoke undecidability. Everybody knows this. Our puzzle above, however, as deconstructed as it may be in the philosophical sense, is decidedly straightforward when it comes to suggesting a solution!

Who will find Mr. Sango Labreuve a wife?

We all love Mr. Labreuve, but our designers have been too lazy, or inadequate, to develop a wife or partner for him. Who will help him out? He is lonely and the old fashioned hat he's wearing is not helping his cause.